Sulli's Story (Extended)

At the end of our junior year, Parker saw me across the lunchroom and told his mom, “I saw Sulie and I want to marry her.” We got to know each other over the summer, started dating, and married a couple of months after high school. He was already in the Coast Guard.

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When we found out we were pregnant with Maverick, Parker was ecstatic—so excited to be a dad and so supportive of all my fears. A month after Maverick was born, he was stationed in San Diego. We lived near the beach. He surfed. We were doing really well.

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Boot camp was hard—the first time we were apart for more than a few days. We couldn’t talk, only write letters. I cried every day he was gone. And now, of course, this season has been the hardest.

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Even so, I have hope. He’s in a better place. He’s happy. I’ll see him again one day. It’s another season of being apart, but we’ll be together again. I hold on to that.

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Losing your favorite person feels like losing part of yourself. Learning how to live without him is hard.

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Before my first meeting, I sat in the car thinking, “Why am I doing this? I don’t want to sit with other sad women.” But it was joyful. I didn’t have to say anything—they knew the pain. Erin and Jill amaze me. They’ve walked through this and still help other widows. I hope I can do that one day. It’s inspiring.

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Community is essential. We were made for fellowship. One Christmas, Erin brought a small stocking—simple and so kind. I felt known and seen.

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I don’t have to quit life. You can find joy again. I’m still scared sometimes, but less than at first. We’re not alone; we have people to guide us. Maverick is almost two—he has a whole life ahead of him. I do too. It’s a little brighter now.

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Where the Bible says God is our Comforter—I hadn’t experienced that until now. I wish everything for Maverick. I know it will be hard without a father. My hope is that he walks with the Lord all his life.